Window One: On My Way
The drawings, paintings and poems in Window One: On My Way were created in my 20’s and early 30’s. When I look at them today I have two contrasting reactions. On the one hand I feel like I am looking into a mirror that reflects, not so much my outer appearance, as my inner state of heart and mind at that early age. From this perspective, I am inclined to keep them to myself as early works that have meaning and value mostly for myself. On the other hand, I find myself looking at them as if someone else created them. In this frame of mind, I am intrigued by the way they reveal the unique way this young man saw himself and the world in this early period of his life. I have decided to share these early works on the chance that they might be of interest to some viewers whether they resonate as something familiar or foreign to their own experience.
Some of the poems included here have a relationship to the accompanying painting or drawing, but for the most part there is no direct correspondence. It is a common state of heart and mind that strove to express itself through these various mediums that connects the written and visual works .
Michael Howard,
March, 2017
On My Way
Early in the morning I awake.
Quietly, without a word,
I am on my way.
What is calling, calling me?
To wonder wander is my way.
Across the miles of plain,
Looms a fortress wall.
Hours pass before I pass,
The temple gate of gods.
What is calling, calling me?
To wonder wander is my way.
Tourists speed,
Snapping the view,
Collecting I’ve-been-there.
What is calling, calling me?
To wonder wander is my way.
From long, long ago…
What is it I recall?
Among these Beings of Rock,
I am coming home,
What is calling, calling me?
To wonder wander is my way.
I leave the highway,
To walk a free heart,
In the towering heights,
In the song of the stream.
What is calling, calling me?
To wonder wander is my way.
To be my self,
On my way.
And yet,
Haunting…
The Unknown walks with me,
On my way.
A Land Hi in Sky Sunset
a normal world at sunset,
for those hurrying by;
for i
the many fragment world complex,
becomes world singing song.
i see a land hi in sky sunset,
being in a land hi in sky sunset,
the sunset radiates,
i radiate the sunset.
a pilgrimage to a land hi in sky sunset.
crystal, blue, calm, is all,
refreshing the soul,
in a bath of golden platter lakes, passing by,
dancing light songs,
somersaulting among evolving rainbow sculptures.
contentment wishes of remain, only destroys.
ploughing the way is with pain.
the world had smothered i,
the vapor way effortlesses,
bubbling to the surface along the stream,
the splendor of passing along the vapor way,
on the plain of blue,
to enter amongst towering cloud peak idols…
so minute, becoming nothing,
infinity entering.
for a moment the i revives to make
one last world whimper that the rest would follow.
from a land hi in sky sunset
i see they are,
in their own, one way or another.
the vapor effortless is transparent mist,
nothing was death,
life begins.
In a land of shadows we walk.
Each step a question,
Who and why am I?
Through this maze of shadows,
How to find our way?
From out the darkness,
Two paths meet.
Who are you in the light of I?
Who am I in the light of you?
The shadow mountains still surround,
But what is this,
Shining between our eyes?
In the land of shadow questions,
Learning to see
I to I.
oli orj
I am
becoming
dome echoing velvet,
becoming
a keyhole moon blossoming
milky way motion mints,
becoming
prancing rainbow dimpled blobs
yawning leaps into blackness,
becoming
orange obbles flowing
purple spray pop ping,
becoming
pulsating white light whistles
glowing lovsilence warmth,
becoming
crystal cubes laughing
melting know now tears,
becoming
whirlpooling pond calm,
becoming
soundless singing suspension,
becoming
i am
oli orj
To the Heroes of the Sun Skin Deep
I am that rather dull looking shadow,
Silently passing by;
I know you have no time for the likes of me.
But as I walk,
I see
I am in the land of the Heroes of the Sun Skin Deep.
I marvel,
How you glow
No less than your frozen gold idol.
Arrayed in your flashy colored armor defense,
Strutting I’m a pretty clever naked ape,
Riding blazing chariots of fiery consuming soul.
And yet,
Do I see in those pretty,
Do you see me eyes,
The blush of only loneliness,
The windows to a soulscape,
Emptiscape, trying to escape?
O, you Gods and Goddesses of the Sun Skin Deep!
Beneath the skin deep world,
In quiet depths of darkness,
A wonder world weaving
Gives birth to the Sun I am
If I Listen
The clamor tog of city cog,
Shatter shakes breaks!
You clattertack clattertack du,
You getterog getterog tu.
Go touf rap rut sackero daei,
Go touf rap rut sackero daei,
Go touf rap rut sackero daei.
And then,
On the morning of the dawn still now,
I
Into the secret deepness lie,
Washing away,
Shacking the sleep of everyday.
Into the stillness,
Sensing the sleeping prisoner I.
Mist of morn arise!
Free the prisoner I.
All around,
If I listen,
Living spaces, Light and Dark,
Echo through the heart.
In the stream,
Bubbles swirl,
Dancing all,
Can I hear?
Awun uwal aroun aroun uroam,
Rorum rolil roham roham.
Behold our dance,
Our breathing script.
Through the masks of form
The glimmer of our being.
Gently approach,
And we reveal
The song of world creating…
Awun uwal aroun aroun uroam,
Rorum rolil roham roham.
With this song,
I walk
In the cog of the corp
Where the cope fret stirs.
Love is Not Lost
It’s a sunny Sunday morning,
A pool of sunshine in my lap,
The morning silence speaks to me
Of the mystery of time.
The sunlight echoes the child of innocence
That once upon a time I was.
But now, who am I,
Now and ever now?
I wonder wander through the world
Looking for that lost something.
Seven years, a life time past,
Within your life I found my life.
Seven years, two lives as one,
So long, so short,
So well known, not known at all.
A life so real,
One day is simply gone.
All things pass away,
The child of innocence must pass away,
To become a child of pain.
The sky of my heart
Fills with clouds of rain.
I had your love
And lost your love.
O mystery in time,
Can this be?
Can love be lost?
Within the silence of sunlight singing,
Nothing is lost.
In the mystery of time,
Love is not lost.